How did this thing about left-wing meaning total government and right-wing meaning no government get started?

It's completely inaccurate. Historically, the right has always represented the ruling class, that, above all, wanted to stay in power, while the left has represented the common people that wanted more freedom. It all started in the 18th century in the French parliament, where the aristocrats sat to the right of the speaker, and the commoners to his left.